Bend over for what LH? What I see are angry posts directed at people who you do not know. I don't know them either. Therefore, I don't feel I have the right to lambast members for the simple reason that there are real people behind the avatars and feel they deserve respect. Just because I don't like someone or disagree with them also does not give me the right to demean them or call them names. However, this is not to say I haven't had my own blowouts here or posted things I later regret after indulging in my own temper fit. Anger often is a mask for pain and sometimes it's easier to get angry then deal with the pain it's masking.
Believe it or not I do understand your situation having family members with the same illness. I've also watched what these various family members did/behaved when there systems were unbalanced - they were not themselves.
I also see you working up for a fight and looking for targets to direct your anger towards to justify your emotional stance. That just won't fly with me. I think the anger you have goes much deeper then at anything anyone ever posted on this forum and you were just looking for some place to unburden some of this toxic energy. Believe it or not - this is a safe place.
I've pointed out that I don't like seeing people attacked who are just expressing a personal opinion. You want to know why? It is personally painful for me to see someone I care about hurt others just as it is painful for me to see others get hurt. And it's easy to love someone while also not liking certain behaviors they may be acting out. I just think all the bluster - is you covering up how vulnerable you really feel. I also see you like the white knight riding out to protect Brook in any way you can as only you - not us - know what is really happening within your family. Basically your stance is letting Brook and everyone else know that you have her back. This is admirable. I think most of us here appreciate having someone in our life who has our back.
I would hope that you can see through what is really going on here. There has been this push me/pull me polarity game playing itself out for months now. And somehow Floyd's posts manages to be the lightening rod. It's a polarity game.
Mercuriel and I have had long discussions about many things and one of the things that was important to us is not to drop down energetically and go into polarity. This is not an easy task. He finds himself getting more and more distant due to not wanting to engage in others BS and I have discovered I don't have much tolerance for it either. I'd rather spend my time learning about new things or helping those that I can. I'm already stuck with some serious karma dealing with an elder brother's BS and truly, that has been going on for a lifetime, so pardon me if I'm somewhat sensitive about this particular issue.
When I say that I love you I come from a place of agape/compassion. However, when I see what you are doing sometimes I just want to smack you. The way I see it is that you need to take better care of yourself. Illness tends to take all of one's emotional reserve so that there really is much left over when it comes to dealing with other people's differences that one finds irritating. I should know given my own medical history and having to deal with my own dysfunctional family of origin. All I can add is that Mists is what the members make it. It is not one individual, it is the collective.
And now onto my own personal world/galactic view. To me Mists is an international play ground where people with all types of different opinions, agendas, religions, beliefs, backgrounds, etc come together. This is an arena. People from all over the world are here everyday reading what we write and also looking at how we resolve our differences. How can we ever hope to become a member of the international galactic gathering if we can't get along in this small cyber arena? For example, it's not easy for me putting up with others BS, anger or differences at times - however, it is worth it to me personally to make the effort.
Now I could just as easily turn the forum over to you and Brook and see how the two of you would handle situations that come up. And just for the record, during this time at Mists I've been slandered, libeled, degraded, cussed at and pretty much anything else one can think up. People chat about me behind my back with knives in hand. And you know what? Such is life if someone truly wants to serve and be a steward of humanity. I've painfully learned to deal with others toxic behavior my not retaliating. This doesn't mean I don't feel like retaliating at times - what it does mean is that I a made a conscious choice not to. I've learned not to give energy to those who engage in these types of behavior because it only makes their acting out worse. Giving energy to those who would do this type of acting out only feeds the beast that would feast off of that type of emotional exchange.
Next, It's not my job to ban Floyd just because you or Brook or someone else would like to see him gone. Members get banned for not following the two rules we have. In fact, in the past I've had members PM me asking me to ban other members they didn't like. It doesn't work like here simply because this forum is self-moderated. The members are in charge and it's up to them how the majority of things play out. For example, if someone goes into a melt down it's not too long before PMs show up in my in-box with links to the infraction. I don't looking for any problems or even potential trouble. Meanwhile, other members join in exchanges and also offer up their opinions - which is again what brings balance to the dialogue exchange.
People come, leave, return again all the time. I'm just not into that whole flounce thingy anymore. I've made my personal commitment and will stick by it until which time it's time of me to move on without fanfare. Anyone can make up any reason as to why they want to leave or stay. It's what they do. I'm just here as a volunteer facilitator to the forum. If folks have differences with each other I expect them to work it out between themselves the best that they can and if possible remain respectful. If not - take a break. Other members can join in the process or not. That is what a free forum is.
It is so true we are able to grow past interpersonal wars.That it can be done with best results is to me reaching ultimate truth, that stellar plateau beyond battles of ideas or simple misunderstandings taking place in the field of our minds. When we can raise ourselves to that place of Love in our Hearts we are one with the Creator and we are One with one another.There is no more gracious place to be .
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