I don't like you Scranton!' 'Like me or not - it's show-time pretty-boy - and you'd better watch your backside - because there are a lot of reptilians, greys, and humans who want to see you fail BIG TIME!' I take a deep breath - try to relax - and calmly whisper, 'Agent Scranton - if we can't even get along - how in the hell am I supposed to interact constructively with the PTB?' Scranton gives me a sideways look, and whispers back, 'You need to know your place. This thing is bigger than you can possibly imagine - and if you come on strong like 'Ghost Busters' - the system will eat you alive.' I sheepishly reply, 'I dreamed of a perfected humanity living in a perfected solar system. I had big ideas. But now that I am confronted with this - I'm not so sure anymore. I don't know where to begin. By the way - where are we going?'
'I'm driving you to a small airport about 5 minutes from here. There you will board a Navy helicopter, which will fly you to an undisclosed location. Everything is compartmentalized. No one knows what anyone else is doing, or where they're going. The system likes it that way. You'll see.' I query, 'Who should I watch-out for?' 'Lucifer.' 'Lucifer?' I'm shocked, and exclaim, 'I asked you a serious question - and now you're being a wise-guy with me!' Scranton has a poker-face, and responds, 'I am very, very serious. What they taught you in Sunday school is BS. Lucifer is the most beautiful woman you have ever seen in your life. She runs this solar system - and answers only to Satan.' 'Now wait a minute! This is ridiculous! I speculated about this sort of thing on the internet - but I didn't really believe it. You're jerking my chain - aren't you?' 'No. I am deadly serious - and I mean DEADLY serious. I'm giving you a heads-up, because you will need to be prepared for the worst. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned - and you have scorned the woman most closely connected with hell. Lucifer's IQ is 532. She has the equivalent of 87 PhD's. She is NOT the forgive and forget type. If you cross her - you're dead-meat - and you've crossed her BIG TIME!'
'When will I have the privilege of meeting her majesty?' 'Soon. But first you must go through 'Galactic Boot Camp' to learn how to survive in the shadowy underworld. This will NOT be a pleasant experience!' I am perplexed, 'Why does this seem so militaristic and hostile? I feel as though I am entering into a Nazi realm of sorts!' 'You are. You will be very lucky to remain sane. Many who have tried to save the world by being knights in shining armor - are now heavily sedated in secret mental institutions.' I nervously blurt-out, 'I can hardly wait for the fun to begin! Fortunately - I'm already insane. I crossed that bridge a long time ago. But I have learned to function somewhat productively and safely - in a limited sort of way - in mainstream society.' Scranton is not amused. 'Anthony - this isn't funny! You haven't seen the dazed and hopeless expressions on the faces of these formerly brave and intelligent people - who are now reduced to rocking back and forth in the fetal position.' I sheepishly reply, 'Sorry. I'm just very nervous and apprehensive about all of this.' Scranton looks me straight in the eye, and says, 'Be afraid. Be very afraid.' I see a Navy Sea Stallion helicopter looming in the distance - with rotor spinning - waiting to devour me. My rendezvous with destiny is imminent.
As we pull up alongside the helicopter - I turn to thank Agent Scranton for the ride - and I notice that his eyes have vertical slits instead of round pupils. I gasp slightly, and he notices my surprise, and laughingly shakes his head, saying 'you haven't seen anything yet! I'm just a 50% human/50% reptile hybrid - and I forgot to put my contacts in when I got the call to pick you up! Sorry about that! I still don't like you - but good-luck anyway!' My hand is shaking as I shake Scranton's hand - and I stumble and fall as I run toward the waiting helicopter. Is this the Helicopter to Hell?
The pilot and co-pilot greet me, as I climb aboard the Sea Stallion helicopter. The door closes with a dull thud - and off we go, into the wild blue yonder! But something is wrong! This seems more like a spacecraft than a helicopter! The helicopter exterior was a hologram! Suddenly everything is dark - and I look out the window - and see thousands of very bright stars! Then I realize that I am onboard an antigravity craft! The co-pilot turns to me, saying, 'Welcome to Astra Airlines!' 'Oh My God!', I exclaim. 'Where the hell are we going?' 'We're just taking you to the International Space Station.' 'Just?!' 'What's going to happen there?' 'You'll find out soon enough. They don't tell us anything. We only know enough to do our jobs properly. Curiosity kills cats, careers - and sometimes it even kills people.'
'OK, I get the picture. I understand the need for compartmentalization, but I prefer openness and transparency.' 'Actually, you'll find that the deeper you get into this thing, the more open and casual everything will be. At first, you'll feel as if you're in a prison camp. Really, boot-camp for beginners is conducted on the I.S.S. If you survive that, things will be a lot better for you.' 'Well, that's something to look forward to. I'd still like to know what they have planned for me. It sounds as if this adventure might be beneficial to humanity, yet I feel as if I might be used and misused in deceptive and nefarious ways.' 'Just go with the flow, without committing to anything in particular. That's all I'm going to say, and I've probably said too much. Please don't quote me.' 'No. I wouldn't do that. Thank-you for the transportation and advice.' 'You're welcome. Now arriving at the International Space Station. Please keep your seatbelt and shoulder harness fastened until we are securely docked. Thank-you for flying Astra Airlines.'
As I enter the International Space Station, I say good-bye to the TR3B pilots, and hello to the station crew. I am directed to a locker filled with space-suits and various pieces of clothing and equipment. I am handed a suit designed to be worn while inside the station. Another suit is to be used for space-walks. I doubt that I'll be using that one anytime soon. I shower and change into the first suit. I'm already beginning to feel like part of the team, even though I sense something dark and ominous lurking behind the scenes. I feel as though I am being constantly watched and listened to. I feel as though there is absolutely no privacy, even when showering and using the restroom. I see cameras mounted everywhere, yet I also sense unseen eyes watching my every move. Perhaps I am being watched by the 'Watchers'. They like to watch...