From Connecting With Sauce ~
This is well worth a read and links quite a few items we've been studying in the last year or so...
http://educate-yourself.org/vcd/bodysnatch...eededited.shtml
8. Debilitation Through Nutrition
9. Financial Dept
11. The Environment
Are especially interesting... Although the writing style isn't polished the content and info contained does seem to tie together a number of topics I've researched independently.
John
From Wyzyrd
I read this yesterday from a link Linda posted the other day (I think). (c:
It reminds me of a time in 1995 when a lady I knew who was very psychic suddenly took me aside and told me I had a large entity attached to my back via a cord. We went outside into the back yard and she did her best to cut the cord and at the end of the day she said she could no longer 'see' this entity.
The next morning, and to this day, I have a cyst that won't go away no matter how many doctors squeeze it etc. !!! Right where she said the cord was attached . . .
This all happened after I took myself to the Veterans Administration Hospital here in town - to the ER - because I was overdosed with drugs and alcohol and had called a suicide hotline. The lady found out I was a Vietnam Era Veteran and told me about the VA and recommended I call a friend to take me to the ER. I completed an inpatient treatment lasting thirty days, and by some act of a higher power I got a counselor that understood and believed me when I told him of my abductions beginning in childhood, as well as a sneaking suspicion that I was at least *started* in an MKULTRA program if not completed. As i've stated somewhere recently I do not recall anything before the third grade and do not recall long stretches of my six years in the military.
I was in the military from 1974 till 1980. Since 1980 I have repeatedly tried to self-destruct using drugs and alcohol. Before the military I was teaching bible studies! (I've learned a lot since then - heh). Religion is one of the ways they keep you in check psychically (it's the Devil)!
In any event I bounced in and out of AA and NA for the next few years. I just couldn't get over ninety days.
This was an intense period of abductions and night visits. I would awaken paralyzed over and over again and have many memories of being taken to ships and being attacked repeatedly by reptilians in my little house. I drank to make it stop. I used drugs to make it stop. Nothing makes it stop. I even rehired Jesus for a while. No luck there.
In 1997 I OD'd again and ended up back at the VA. They sent me by ambulance to the Topeka VA which had a different sort of program. The attendant on the ambulance was a beautiful girl. (Start thinking about Eve Lorgan and the Alien Love Bite at this point). I was in Topeka for thirty days and the day I got back this girl called me. We were married two months later. It was my first marriage and I was 42. She was 27.
She had two little kids, a boy 8 and a girl 5. I fell in love with them and stayed clean and sober for the next eight years. I raised them. The wife had taken a job at the American Red Cross and was literally gone from Monday morning until Friday night every week traveling on blood donation runs. Meanwhile I had gone back to school and gotten an Emergency Medical Technician education and began working on the ambulance. Then I got a position at the Red Cross myself. (Google Len Horowitz to learn about the RC. He is right).
During all this time she was gone I had immersed myself in the internets.
I found Cyberspaceorbit, Branton, the Andromedans, the Cassiopaens, and all the rest. I was reading Marciniak, Seth, and every other book I could find at the metaphysical bookstores. I still cannot read the book E.T. 101 without crying. Find it and read it. It is so uplifting.
Fast forward to 2005. Eight years clean and sober and two teenagers in the house! The wife and I hadn't gotten along since the first few months of the marriage. I was a hopeless romantic, leaving notes and sending flowers etc. She told me to knock it off - it's stupid. You can imagine how I felt about that. In any event, I think we stayed together because she was always gone. She had a built in babysitter and didn't have to interact with the kids except on the weekends. Long story there, and I don't want to take her inventory here.
During those eight years we had a plethora of paranormal activity in and around the house. We all had stories about it to share almost every morning. I'm positive the kids were being taken. My wife is a Witch and has no problem with earth based entities and ghosts etc. but would not entertain the possibility of aliens. One night she came home and saw a group of short beings standing around me while I was asleep in bed. She said she 'talked' to them but it wasn't words. After that she was a bit more open to the alien possibilities. (c:
During this time they got sneaky with me. I began being stalked in the astral plane, and taken non-physically. This continues to the present time.
In August of 2005 she announced she was leaving to live with her boyfriend and that we needed a divorce. Of course I agreed. Interestingly the two kids asked to stay with me. That was fine with her.
In September of 2005 through a series of events my 89 year old Dad, the only living relative I have aside from a thirty year old daughter conceived during my military time (we connected later and I have three grandchildren) fell and broke his hip. He ended up in hospital for weeks then in ICU after heart attacks and strokes. I had to make the decision to unplug him that month. I had to make it alone. I miss my Dad.
I need to insert a short history here. My memories begin when I was eight years old, in the third grade. My Mother had - the only word is kidnapped - me from Ohio where I was born and brought me to Kansas. I recall bits and pieces of cement rooms and doctors - strange children that were deformed - and being terrified of my bedroom at night. She told me my Dad was dead. During this time I was molested often by her female friend Jean.
One day in the third grade I came out after school and my Dad was standing there. I knew him immediately. We started sneaking around after school getting ice cream and things like that. He told me I could tell my Mom he was here but I did not. I never did tell him about Jean.
One night (still in the third grade) I got up to go to the bathroom. This was always an adventure because I was terrified to go into my bedroom, and once there terrified to leave. That damned closet! And the faces in the windows. Anyway I got to the bathroom and found my Mom in a pool of blood. She had slit her wrists. I called my Dad and he and the police came and got me. I never heard from my Mother after that. One time while I was home on leave from overseas I recall putting on my dress uniform and going to my Mother's house. She answered the door and we talked for a few minutes. She said 'I see they got you into the military anyway.' I still don't know what she meant, but I have my suspicions. My Dad found her obituary in 1983.
Also I might add that I have had cluster headaches, the worst headaches imaginable, much worse than migraines, since 1980 - when I got out of the military.
Ok back to 2005. After my wife left one month and my dad died the next month, I lasted approximately two more months before I bought a quart of Whiskey and a pile of drugs. Her two kids were still living with me and though I tried to hide it they knew. I started the same pattern I had in the nineties - clean for three or four months, going to meetings, then off again. I wanted to die. Matt turned 18 and joined the Marines. He goes to Afghanistan next month. Kim is 17 and moved back in with her mother when she was 16 - I couldn't handle her, and as well I was using and drinking. *sigh* I still love them and they love me. Kim comes over all the time and Matt calls me when he can and stays here when he is home on leave.
So for the last five years I have tried to self-destruct. I think it is called Omega programming. I refuse to submit. On Christmas 2009 I made a conscious decision to live. I did not go to the VA this time, I detoxed at home alone with my dogs. I do go to the VA for PTSD groups and substance abuse groups. I feel safe out there at the VA. I see a shrink every other week (she also believes me about the aliens and the rest - another higher power thing). I have been going to two and three Narcotics Anonymous meetings a day, and now lead the Friday night meeting. I have about one hundred days clean.
Late last year I was declared totally disabled by Social Security. I am barely making it on the money I get. The VA also declared me totally disabled but won't pay me because I am already getting Social Security.
I am 54. I went for disability due to a fried out back, the headaches, a fused right wrist (I am right handed) and then we have the mental problems. Severe PTSD, Major Depression, Severe anxiety attacks, and things like that. Last year the VA had me on so many meds I was a zombie. When I sobered up and cleaned up at Christmas I developed side effects from some of the meds. I told them I was done being a lab rat, and they could keep their meds. My shrink agreed that cognitive therapy was best for me because of the side effects, and also doesn't believe in medicating the problem. I was doing that myself with the drugs and alcohol. Now I'm only on Wellbutrin for depression and also as a feeble attempt to stop smoking.
So. I decided as well to begin posting again on the internet. I stopped in 2005. The last five years sucked! I still read everything but had nothing to say. Well . . . now I do. I want to know what happened and is happening to me. I want to experience happiness and joy despite the dracos, greys, clones, PTB, discarnates, ghosts and ghouls!
I'll pass for now. Thanks for listening to me rant and spill my guts.
Oh I have sleep disorders (c:
I have a huge K tank of oxygen here at home. It is the only thing that helps.
Cluster Headaches are not migraines, however. Here are a couple of excerpts from wiki . . .
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cluster_headache
I began having them the first few weeks out of the military. I've had them for 30 years. After many ER trips thinking I was having a stroke, and being suicidal as the above mentions, I was finally diagnosed at the VA in 1998 and then began to be a lab rat for drugs. Finally a doctor gave me the oxygen, which sort of helps.
I tend to link them with whatever happened to me in the military. Perhaps some sort of conditioning to self destruct along with the others.
I don't know. I hate being negative but I'm trying to get my story out so I can heal . . .
That reminded me of a related story!
In 1998 when I was being seen at the VA for these headaches they were trying all sorts of drugs on me. Lithium. Prednisone IV drips. Depakoke. Imitrex auto-injected shots. Caffergot. Nothing worked until I got the oxygen, then barely. Ah well . . .
But what I recalled just now is the trip to the Neurologist and the CAT scan done. When I went in to visit him for the results he acted very weird - reluctant to discuss the films - and he refused to show them to me.
Of course I wonder what showed up in the films. Implants? I had several nights during the early nineties when upon awakening my right nostril was filled with blood and had blood on the pillow. Some people say that is one way they get an implant in. I tend to think I've had some sort of implants since early childhood, as I have a large scar on the back of my head (unexplained) and another on my forehead (also unexplained). Who knows?
Have you ever had the feeling that someone else is looking out of your eyes? I have that from time to time. I even provide a narrative of what I am looking at. I'm not sure if it is benevolent or malevolent. It feels sort of neutral.
I wonder if this is the right thread for this, or if I should even be sharing all of this. I'm trying to reach out. It isn't easy . . . thanks again for reading my crap.
It took me all this time to wade through Body Snatchers - I had to keep taking breaks.
A lot of the info is right on the money imo but some of it - well - is sort of weird!
Then again, believing that reptoid aliens take me for rides is a bit weird as well - as I ranted above. (c:
I also wanted to bump this thread in case anyone wants to scroll up and read my story - I would like some input if possible whether or not similar things have happened to other members (including the self-destruct-addictions thing).
I have a horrendous admission to make - I'm on facebook! However, I'm finding all sorts of people there. I have a number of the whistle blowers from PC and PA in my friends list now! It's sort of cool to get the updates straight from the 'horses mouth.' But I refuse to get sucked into the idiotic games on facebook like farmville (c:
Original closed post at Invision: http://mistsofavalon.invisionplus.net/?mforum=mistsofavalon&showtopic=300
This is well worth a read and links quite a few items we've been studying in the last year or so...
http://educate-yourself.org/vcd/bodysnatch...eededited.shtml
8. Debilitation Through Nutrition
9. Financial Dept
11. The Environment
Are especially interesting... Although the writing style isn't polished the content and info contained does seem to tie together a number of topics I've researched independently.
John
From Wyzyrd
I read this yesterday from a link Linda posted the other day (I think). (c:
It reminds me of a time in 1995 when a lady I knew who was very psychic suddenly took me aside and told me I had a large entity attached to my back via a cord. We went outside into the back yard and she did her best to cut the cord and at the end of the day she said she could no longer 'see' this entity.
The next morning, and to this day, I have a cyst that won't go away no matter how many doctors squeeze it etc. !!! Right where she said the cord was attached . . .
This all happened after I took myself to the Veterans Administration Hospital here in town - to the ER - because I was overdosed with drugs and alcohol and had called a suicide hotline. The lady found out I was a Vietnam Era Veteran and told me about the VA and recommended I call a friend to take me to the ER. I completed an inpatient treatment lasting thirty days, and by some act of a higher power I got a counselor that understood and believed me when I told him of my abductions beginning in childhood, as well as a sneaking suspicion that I was at least *started* in an MKULTRA program if not completed. As i've stated somewhere recently I do not recall anything before the third grade and do not recall long stretches of my six years in the military.
I was in the military from 1974 till 1980. Since 1980 I have repeatedly tried to self-destruct using drugs and alcohol. Before the military I was teaching bible studies! (I've learned a lot since then - heh). Religion is one of the ways they keep you in check psychically (it's the Devil)!
In any event I bounced in and out of AA and NA for the next few years. I just couldn't get over ninety days.
This was an intense period of abductions and night visits. I would awaken paralyzed over and over again and have many memories of being taken to ships and being attacked repeatedly by reptilians in my little house. I drank to make it stop. I used drugs to make it stop. Nothing makes it stop. I even rehired Jesus for a while. No luck there.
In 1997 I OD'd again and ended up back at the VA. They sent me by ambulance to the Topeka VA which had a different sort of program. The attendant on the ambulance was a beautiful girl. (Start thinking about Eve Lorgan and the Alien Love Bite at this point). I was in Topeka for thirty days and the day I got back this girl called me. We were married two months later. It was my first marriage and I was 42. She was 27.
She had two little kids, a boy 8 and a girl 5. I fell in love with them and stayed clean and sober for the next eight years. I raised them. The wife had taken a job at the American Red Cross and was literally gone from Monday morning until Friday night every week traveling on blood donation runs. Meanwhile I had gone back to school and gotten an Emergency Medical Technician education and began working on the ambulance. Then I got a position at the Red Cross myself. (Google Len Horowitz to learn about the RC. He is right).
During all this time she was gone I had immersed myself in the internets.
I found Cyberspaceorbit, Branton, the Andromedans, the Cassiopaens, and all the rest. I was reading Marciniak, Seth, and every other book I could find at the metaphysical bookstores. I still cannot read the book E.T. 101 without crying. Find it and read it. It is so uplifting.
Fast forward to 2005. Eight years clean and sober and two teenagers in the house! The wife and I hadn't gotten along since the first few months of the marriage. I was a hopeless romantic, leaving notes and sending flowers etc. She told me to knock it off - it's stupid. You can imagine how I felt about that. In any event, I think we stayed together because she was always gone. She had a built in babysitter and didn't have to interact with the kids except on the weekends. Long story there, and I don't want to take her inventory here.
During those eight years we had a plethora of paranormal activity in and around the house. We all had stories about it to share almost every morning. I'm positive the kids were being taken. My wife is a Witch and has no problem with earth based entities and ghosts etc. but would not entertain the possibility of aliens. One night she came home and saw a group of short beings standing around me while I was asleep in bed. She said she 'talked' to them but it wasn't words. After that she was a bit more open to the alien possibilities. (c:
During this time they got sneaky with me. I began being stalked in the astral plane, and taken non-physically. This continues to the present time.
In August of 2005 she announced she was leaving to live with her boyfriend and that we needed a divorce. Of course I agreed. Interestingly the two kids asked to stay with me. That was fine with her.
In September of 2005 through a series of events my 89 year old Dad, the only living relative I have aside from a thirty year old daughter conceived during my military time (we connected later and I have three grandchildren) fell and broke his hip. He ended up in hospital for weeks then in ICU after heart attacks and strokes. I had to make the decision to unplug him that month. I had to make it alone. I miss my Dad.
I need to insert a short history here. My memories begin when I was eight years old, in the third grade. My Mother had - the only word is kidnapped - me from Ohio where I was born and brought me to Kansas. I recall bits and pieces of cement rooms and doctors - strange children that were deformed - and being terrified of my bedroom at night. She told me my Dad was dead. During this time I was molested often by her female friend Jean.
One day in the third grade I came out after school and my Dad was standing there. I knew him immediately. We started sneaking around after school getting ice cream and things like that. He told me I could tell my Mom he was here but I did not. I never did tell him about Jean.
One night (still in the third grade) I got up to go to the bathroom. This was always an adventure because I was terrified to go into my bedroom, and once there terrified to leave. That damned closet! And the faces in the windows. Anyway I got to the bathroom and found my Mom in a pool of blood. She had slit her wrists. I called my Dad and he and the police came and got me. I never heard from my Mother after that. One time while I was home on leave from overseas I recall putting on my dress uniform and going to my Mother's house. She answered the door and we talked for a few minutes. She said 'I see they got you into the military anyway.' I still don't know what she meant, but I have my suspicions. My Dad found her obituary in 1983.
Also I might add that I have had cluster headaches, the worst headaches imaginable, much worse than migraines, since 1980 - when I got out of the military.
Ok back to 2005. After my wife left one month and my dad died the next month, I lasted approximately two more months before I bought a quart of Whiskey and a pile of drugs. Her two kids were still living with me and though I tried to hide it they knew. I started the same pattern I had in the nineties - clean for three or four months, going to meetings, then off again. I wanted to die. Matt turned 18 and joined the Marines. He goes to Afghanistan next month. Kim is 17 and moved back in with her mother when she was 16 - I couldn't handle her, and as well I was using and drinking. *sigh* I still love them and they love me. Kim comes over all the time and Matt calls me when he can and stays here when he is home on leave.
So for the last five years I have tried to self-destruct. I think it is called Omega programming. I refuse to submit. On Christmas 2009 I made a conscious decision to live. I did not go to the VA this time, I detoxed at home alone with my dogs. I do go to the VA for PTSD groups and substance abuse groups. I feel safe out there at the VA. I see a shrink every other week (she also believes me about the aliens and the rest - another higher power thing). I have been going to two and three Narcotics Anonymous meetings a day, and now lead the Friday night meeting. I have about one hundred days clean.
Late last year I was declared totally disabled by Social Security. I am barely making it on the money I get. The VA also declared me totally disabled but won't pay me because I am already getting Social Security.
I am 54. I went for disability due to a fried out back, the headaches, a fused right wrist (I am right handed) and then we have the mental problems. Severe PTSD, Major Depression, Severe anxiety attacks, and things like that. Last year the VA had me on so many meds I was a zombie. When I sobered up and cleaned up at Christmas I developed side effects from some of the meds. I told them I was done being a lab rat, and they could keep their meds. My shrink agreed that cognitive therapy was best for me because of the side effects, and also doesn't believe in medicating the problem. I was doing that myself with the drugs and alcohol. Now I'm only on Wellbutrin for depression and also as a feeble attempt to stop smoking.
So. I decided as well to begin posting again on the internet. I stopped in 2005. The last five years sucked! I still read everything but had nothing to say. Well . . . now I do. I want to know what happened and is happening to me. I want to experience happiness and joy despite the dracos, greys, clones, PTB, discarnates, ghosts and ghouls!
I'll pass for now. Thanks for listening to me rant and spill my guts.
Oh I have sleep disorders (c:
I have a huge K tank of oxygen here at home. It is the only thing that helps.
Cluster Headaches are not migraines, however. Here are a couple of excerpts from wiki . . .
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cluster_headache
I began having them the first few weeks out of the military. I've had them for 30 years. After many ER trips thinking I was having a stroke, and being suicidal as the above mentions, I was finally diagnosed at the VA in 1998 and then began to be a lab rat for drugs. Finally a doctor gave me the oxygen, which sort of helps.
I tend to link them with whatever happened to me in the military. Perhaps some sort of conditioning to self destruct along with the others.
I don't know. I hate being negative but I'm trying to get my story out so I can heal . . .
That reminded me of a related story!
In 1998 when I was being seen at the VA for these headaches they were trying all sorts of drugs on me. Lithium. Prednisone IV drips. Depakoke. Imitrex auto-injected shots. Caffergot. Nothing worked until I got the oxygen, then barely. Ah well . . .
But what I recalled just now is the trip to the Neurologist and the CAT scan done. When I went in to visit him for the results he acted very weird - reluctant to discuss the films - and he refused to show them to me.
Of course I wonder what showed up in the films. Implants? I had several nights during the early nineties when upon awakening my right nostril was filled with blood and had blood on the pillow. Some people say that is one way they get an implant in. I tend to think I've had some sort of implants since early childhood, as I have a large scar on the back of my head (unexplained) and another on my forehead (also unexplained). Who knows?
Have you ever had the feeling that someone else is looking out of your eyes? I have that from time to time. I even provide a narrative of what I am looking at. I'm not sure if it is benevolent or malevolent. It feels sort of neutral.
I wonder if this is the right thread for this, or if I should even be sharing all of this. I'm trying to reach out. It isn't easy . . . thanks again for reading my crap.
It took me all this time to wade through Body Snatchers - I had to keep taking breaks.
A lot of the info is right on the money imo but some of it - well - is sort of weird!
Then again, believing that reptoid aliens take me for rides is a bit weird as well - as I ranted above. (c:
I also wanted to bump this thread in case anyone wants to scroll up and read my story - I would like some input if possible whether or not similar things have happened to other members (including the self-destruct-addictions thing).
I have a horrendous admission to make - I'm on facebook! However, I'm finding all sorts of people there. I have a number of the whistle blowers from PC and PA in my friends list now! It's sort of cool to get the updates straight from the 'horses mouth.' But I refuse to get sucked into the idiotic games on facebook like farmville (c:
Original closed post at Invision: http://mistsofavalon.invisionplus.net/?mforum=mistsofavalon&showtopic=300
